Fruit of the Spirit

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I spent last weekend with a group of amazing women.  Twenty-seven of us traveled to North Myrtle Beach, SC for a time of fellowship and worship.  I go every year but this year was especially poignant for me.  I felt Him and I was challenged.  The theme this year was Fruit of the Spirit which is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  I have spent this week camping on these terms, doing word studies, and below is a brief summation of what I have found. 

I know I most often use my blog for fun things like cooking, organizing and decorating but, through all of this, my goal is transparency.  If I am to be transparent then I must show you what has been so heavily on my heart...

But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh.  For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please.  But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the Law.  Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.  But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

- Galatians 5:16-23 (NASB)

LOVE ~ We are to love one another.  Loving someone who is nice to us and loves us back is the easy part.  It is also only the tip of the iceberg.  We are also called to love those who do not love us back.  The ones who openly hate us.  The ones that aren't nice.  The ones that are down and out.  The ones that have nothing to give us in return.

So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience;  bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you.

- Colossians 3:12-14

JOY ~ Joy is a choice.  This is really important.  It is not just a feeling any more than love is just a feeling.  It's a decision.  Also, joy does not equal happiness.  I have most often found the joy in my life during periods of trial.  Ever heard the phrase "I may love you right now but I don't necessarily like you."  Joy is similar but instead should read "I may have joy right now but I am not happy".  When things go south it is easy to become downtrodden.  You have to have joy.  Joy means believing in your heart that God has your best interest at heart.  Even when times are tough, focus on all the ways God IS providing and be thankful.

I will be full of joy in the Lord, my soul will be glad in my God; for he has put on me the clothing of salvation, covering me with the robe of righteousness, as the husband puts on a fair head-dress, and the bride makes herself beautiful with jewels.

- Isaiah 61:10

PEACE ~ Peace is a hard one.  It's being content and knowing God is in control.  For me, my nature is to plan and try to take care of everything.  The hardest lesson for me to learn is that sometimes .. the only thing I can do .. is let go.  God never sleeps.  He is always in control.  At times when I am calm and at peace and I can sleep easily with the storm raging around me .. those are the times that I know I have found peace.

The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, because he trusts in You.  Trust in the Lord forever, for in God the Lord, we have an everlasting Rock.

- Isaiah 26:3-4


For God is not a God of disorder but of peace.

- 1 Corinthians 14:33

PATIENCE ~Waiting.  This is a really hard thing for me.  It's part of my nature as a planner.  I think I have everything figured out and then He doesn't move when I "need" him to.  I purposely put the quotations because no one knows what I need better than He does.  He always has my best interest at heart and he will always provide what I need.  Therefore, I need to wait. Patiently.  Quietly.  To us, hindsight is 20/20 and we always see why things worked out for the better.  God sees 20/20 in the past, present and future.  He never says "if I only knew" because he always does.

I waited patiently for the Lord; and He inclined to me and heard my cry.  He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay, an He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm.  He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; many will see and fear and will trust in the Lord.

- Psalm 40:1-3

KINDNESS ~ I think kindness comes most naturally.  I also believe that I often think of kind things to do but never actually do them .. all the while still giving myself some sort of credit for it.  This is not done consciously but it is still done.  Giving a helping hand, a smile or a kind word is really important.  Try to say something mean with a smile on your face.  Or tell someone you love them while frowning.  It is really hard to do.  I think if you smile more often then your actions will follow and I wouldn't be surprised if your mood is bolstered because of it.

For length of days and years of life and peace they will add to you.  Do not let kindness and truth leave you; Bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.  So you will find favor and good repute in the sight of God and man.

- Proverbs 3:2-4

GOODNESS ~ Goodness is multi-faceted.  It is a combination of kindness, grace and purification from wickedness. 

For it is by grace you have been saved through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God--not as a result of works, so that no one can boast.  For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

- Ephesians 2:8-10

Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men.  At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures.  We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another.  But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of His mercy.  He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by His grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.  This is a trustworthy saying.  And I want you to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good.  These things are excellent and profitable for everyone.

- Titus 3:1-8

FAITHFULNESS ~ When I think of faithfulness, I think of a promise of unconditional devotion.  It means "I am pulling for you. No matter what.  Every time."  We don't see a lot of faithfulness in the world.  People tend to get finicky about things; whether it's because it got hard, unpopular or inconvenient.  We tend to root for our teams .. until a better team comes along.  Faithfulness means you will always keep the best interest at heart.  You support and love without ceasing.  God shows us unwavering faithfulness and we should do the same.

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, or his compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is tour faithfulness.  I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him."

- Lamentations 3:22-24

I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, "Move from here to there" and it will move.  Nothing will be impossible for you.

- Matthew 17:20-21

GENTLENESS ~ Gentleness is akin to kindness.  I have learned that sometimes I just need to be gentler.  I need to control my tongue more.  I need to listen more and talk less.  I tend to be a little too blunt and a little too forceful with the ones I love.  I know that they love me unconditionally (especially my husband) but that does not give me the write to hurt his feelings.  This does not mean I need to sugar coat or lie, though.  It just means that I need to take in consideration the other person's feelings before I end up steam-rolling them.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.  The tongue of the wise makes knowledge axceptable, but the mouth of fools spouts folly.  The eyes of the Lord are in every place, watching the evil and the good.
- Proverbs 15:1-3

Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
- Ephesians 4:1-3

SELF-CONTROL ~ This is the fruit that I need to work on the most.  Most people assume I have a lot of self-control because I seem organized and on top of things.  This isn't a false front.  I am organized and I typically am on top of things.  This is not what I need to work on. This is not what self-control means.  Self-control has nothing to do with self.  It has nothing to do with my works.  It has everything to do with me surrendering my control and allowing God to take over.  And this is precisely what I need to work on.  I have spent so much time controlling my "bubble" and really it's all in vain.  God has a plan and he is in complete control.  I get so wrapped up in the daily minutiae and I need to stop.  There are some things that, no matter what, I can not plan or control them.  A big example of this is starting a family.  I can not control when I get pregnant. I can do everything right but I will not be successful unless it is God's will.  I can not plan and make sure we are ready because we never will be.  I will never have enough in savings.  I will never have everything figured out.  I need to stop pushing so hard, gain some self-control and ALLOW myself to give up.  It is not weakness.  It is strength.  It is not failure.  It is success. 

Here's my confession:  We want to start a family but I have not allowed myself to give up the control yet.  I haven't allowed myself to come to terms with the fact that .. no matter what I do .. I will never be prepared.  I know all of this is my head but I need to know it in my heart.  I need God to move in me and allow me to release these stresses.  It is my personal battle and I am losing.  I have put my own comforts (comfort in knowing "we got this covered") ahead of my love for God and my love for my husband.  My husband has been completely patient and is waiting for me.  Because of this study I have made vast improvements.  I am not out of the woods yet but I have called out my sin and uncovered it's face.  I can not hide anymore and I need to face the truth.  This is the only way I can move forward and praise Him.

But since we belong to the day, let us be self-controlled, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and the hope of salvation as a helmet.
- 1 Thessalonians 5:8

Therefore, prepare your minds for actions; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.  As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance.  But just as He who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: "Be hold , because I am holy."
- 1 Peter 1:13-16

Perfect Sunrise.  Perfect Promise.

For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love.  For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.  But if anyone does not have them, he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins.
- 2 Peter 1:5-9

By the way - The picture below is of the shirts I had made for the retreat.  My friend Heather at Fermata Threads created them.  She is great to work with and has secured my business from now on.  If you have any tshirt needs, please visit her.  Thanks!



Thanks Heather!