Fresh Start and New Beginnings

This is the speed bump sign in Europe .. seriously :)

Today marks the beginning of October.  I adore this month.  It's my favorite month (and favorite season for that matter).  I don't know if it's from memories past revolving around new school years or because the weather changes so drastically but October is when I tend to start things. I guess you could call them "October Resolutions" instead of "New Years Resolutions". (Too far?  Yeah, sorry about that.)

This season is turning out to be no different than Falls of the past.  We have a few house/decorating changes in the works (one of which may or may not include a sledgehammer :)) and lots of parties, showers, and out of town trips to attend.  Frankly, I am really excited.  I love the hustle and bustle of new adventures and I am welcoming them with open arms.

The one thing that remains on our minds is ... prego-ness.  With October should come my first period after Andrew.  My doc said to expect it 4-6 weeks after surgery so I guess we will see.  Here's the catch though .. Mark and I have not, and are not, taking any precautions.  I did not get pregnant immediately last time and I don't expect to get pregnant immediately this time .. but it's always a possibility.  I know I am supposed to wait one cycle but .. I honestly am at the point where we are just letting what happens happen.

I am telling you all of this in way of an apology.  I wrote this entire diatribe about how this was blog was a space without elephants and how this was my outlet to tell you what is going on in my life ... and then I blocked you all out of one of the biggest experiences ever.  I don't necessarily regret not keeping you 100% in the loop because it was a personal journey I needed to sort out before inviting the world in .. but I do apologize for being MIA in spite of it.

This time around will be different.  That is not to say we will announce any pregnancy at 4 weeks .. because we won't .. but I will do a much better job at keeping you in the loop and letting you know what else is going on and what we are feeling.  So in a week's time .. it is back to "Bump Watch 2012/2013".

How am I feeling?  Relaxed and excited, perhaps.  I am relaxed this time because we are just going to 'do our thang' and not worry about charting or timing everything perfectly.  I'm also excited because, well duh, I want to be a mom again!  It took four months the first time and who knows how long it will take this time around.. 4 months? 4 years?.  All I know is .. I'm ready!

Motherhood 101: The First Year by Kate Conner

source

My friend Lena sent me the link below.  I am blogging this so I can a) share it with all of you moms out there, and b) have it on hand for when my time comes.

Motherhood 101: The First Year | Kate Conner


Thoughts?

My Pledge & Apologies to Parents

I have received a couple mother-related things lately.  They've made me smile for one reason or another so I thought I would share. First things first...

Apologies to the Parents I Judged is an article I read via my friend Lena.  This article made me both laugh and cringe. 

Here's my confession:  I am not currently a mother.  Yes, I have judged.

I used to judge much worse several years ago.  I would see strangers and their "terrible" children and think "I wouldn't have handled it that way."  Of course I would never say that to someone's face but the writer of the article brought up a good point:  I didn't have to.  This makes me sad and embarrassed.

Over the past couple years several of my closest friends have become mothers.  Through them, I have seen more of what the "real world" is like and my idealistic/unrealistic/hypocritical bubble has greatly shrunk.  The fact remains though that I am not a mother.  I can babysit and emerge myself all I want in the lifestyle but I am still an impostor.  I'm still looking outside in.  I do not look at my friend's children and consider them bad.  I do not look at how their situations are handled and think my friend's chose poorly.  I know better now.  I have learned there is no such thing as the right way and that every child and circumstance is different. 

Do I still play the "What Would I Do?" game? Of course.  And I bet you that other mothers do as well.  I think it's human nature (especially women's) to put yourself in someone else's shoes and "solve" their problems.  It's not right.   It's just how it seems to be.  I can guarantee you though that my mouth stays shut and my face blank.  If and when I play my little game now it is purely for an answer to the question and not because I think I could do it better.  I couldn't.

Maybe I'm right, maybe I'm wrong, but I feel that when all of your perfectly tidy hopes and dreams don't pan out the way you thought .. you can be the one mom looking at the other naive newcomer, gritting your teeth smiling and saying "Welcome .. it's never how you planned.."

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Sooooo I may not be a mother to a child but Mark and I are parents to a wonderful pup.  (No I am NOT comparing the two .. it's NOT the same thing .. just bare with me...)  Mark and I tend to be very strict puppy-parents.  Our friends and family give us a hard time about this and predict we will be "nazis" as parents.  We laugh and are kind of OK with this because we know we really won't be like that.  I have no idea what we will be like as parents.  How can anyone?  I know we are going in with certain expectations and I know those will, most likely, drastically change.  It's a learning process.

Well my friend Rebecca found the "Meanest Mom Pledge" and sent it to me.  You can see which side she is on ;)  Well this made me laugh and I have to say .. I love it.  So with a sense of humor, read my future pledge to my future offspring.  I honestly do love what it says .. we'll just see how much I can stick to it when the time comes :)

27

I turned 27 three days ago. I think I am still absorbing what that means. With that being said, it's not the actual age that is giving me pause. I think I am one of the few girls that actually loves getting older. It's more about what comes with said age.


When I was younger I came up with an estimated timeline of my life. It's one of those far-fetched things that I am sure a lot of people do. It's the "by the time I'm __ I will be ___" schedule that you compare your life with to see if you're "on track" or not. This can be both a good and bad thing. It can be good because it can fuel your dreams and push you to achieve goals. It can be bad because those dreams and goals were set at an age when you most likely didn't know what went into making them happen.

I have been blessed. Aside from only one or two aspects .. my life is "right on track". School, work, marriage, etc all happened when I expected. It may not have turned out exactly how I originally planned but the timing was nevertheless perfect. I have spent a few years now floating along with no big adjustments on the horizon. It's been more about maintenance and fine-tuning. Well, things are about to change.

I know I've shared my baby fever with you .. frequently. My want ebbs and flows. There are days when it's all I can think about and there are days when I am shouting praises that I am child-free. This will probably never change. The main factor is though that we want kids and I have always planned to have my first one at 28. That's what this monologue boils down to. Considering the 40 week delay and my crazy math ... instead of having a year left .. I feel like I have 2 months left.  Twenty-eight feels a lot closer than it used to.

Are we going to plan a family based on my own neurotic schedule for my life? Absolutely not. I'm not THAT crazy ;)  It's just that all the other goals have come and gone fairly effortlessly and this is the first one that really has me taking a step back, taking a deep breath, and looking at the bigger picture. Who knows what will happen and when. Maybe this is the point at which the path splits. Maybe not. It's just a whole lotta food for thought .. and I'm stuffed.

Is it a boy or girl?

So I am at the age (as well as most of my friends) where starting a family becomes a real reality and, for some, top priority.  A year or two ago I came across something called a "Chinese Gender Prediction" calendar.  It predicts the gender of your baby based on the mother's age at conception and the month it was concieved.  At first I gave the chart about as much thought as I do daily horoscopes (as in none) but, over the years, I have noticed an unsettling fact:  It seems to be right!?

I have gone through m-a-n-y combinations of friends/relatives/coworkers/etc and, aside from the occasional set of twins, this graph has only been wrong once!  Those odds are a little too good, for me.  This calendar was at the front of my mind today because a couple of my friends just found out they are having a baby girl .. and yes .. that was the prediction I made several months ago based on this calender.

So all in all I find this graph to be both intriguing and creepy.  I am SURE it is wrong in some instances .. I just haven't come across them yet.  So, if you are reading this and are expecting but don't know what it is, check this out and see what it says.  I would love to know if it turns out to be true.  At least you can get a head start in picking names, right?